Governor Schwarzenegger Vetoes Cosmetic Surgery Bill

Some of you may have read the article about the death of Kanye’s West’s mother, Donda West , that Valerie wrote last year.   Although it is unclear that Donda’s death could have been avoided had she a full physical which apparently the first surgeon she consulted with required.  She chose not to go with him.  She did, however, choose a surgeon which did not require a full physical.  She also chose, or rather the surgeon did not enforce, that she stay overnight. This in itself could have saved her life.

Unfortunately, we will never know what could have happened or not happened had other choices been made. We can only speculate on the outcome. What we can’t deny is that having a full physical and heeding your surgeon’s advice on aftercare can certainly increase the odds in your favor.

But to get to the point of this article. After Donda’s death, a bill (AB 2968) was proposed that would require cosmetic surgery patients to undergo a full physical before having surgery.  While it created only a nominal uproar in the cosmetic surgery community over the government’s laws being placed on one’s own body, it received the majority support.   It made sense to me as well.  I feel it is good practice to get a full physical, give a full medical history and get clearance from a physician before being accepted for any plastic surgery procedure. At least for your first one, or the first one in quite a while, and definitely as you mature.

But, it was announced today, that it did not, in fact, pass.  I honestly didn’t expect this in a million years for the bill not to pass, however the reason that was given was not that Governor Schwarzenegger didn’t agree with the bill, but rather because there were 900 bills to be either signed or vetoed.  And if he did nothing, they would all turn into law. Scary!  So in lieu of weighing each one, many of them got a “This bill does not meet that standard, and I cannot sign it at this time,”  Which is better than letting all pass to law when he hasn’ttime to fully review them. I suspect it will go up again, and either it will or won’t be officially denied.

This issue further drives home the warning that you simply must be absolutely honest with your plastic surgeon, stay up to date on your own health, and abide his wishes when it come pre- and post-op care.  Preparation is also key.  For instance, quit smoking well in advance before your cosmetic surgery, attempt to reach a good weight before having surgery, stay active, and eat a balanced diet in your day to day life.  We worry about everything under the sun but our health until something happens.  You know what they say, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

What’s With the Rehash of Simon Cowell’s Plastic Surgery Comment?

Is the news getting that stale and desperate for celebrity gossip? He said that ages ago, 2004 in fact.  Re-blogging it has a snowball effect, me included.  He has made it abundantly clear then men have no need to keep themselves looking young via surgery (I believe his exact words were “ridiculous”), but has no qualms about having Botox injections himself.  So, what? is a scalping going too far, but Botox a means with which to stay looking young? 

Granted, although I abhor the man’s demeanor, he has great hair (which he claims is real, good for him), great skin and great teeth. Also, his gimmick is the ‘talent’ of being cruel, not looking good.  He could gain 100 pounds and still have a job as long as he is making severe fun of others.  He is not graded on his appearance; that’s what Paula’s for.

It’s just another indication that the need for staying young-looking and beautiful is still hugely one-sided. Especially in Hollyweird.  While I do not intend to ever go silently into that aging night, I will say that I feel a woman should never be made to feel as though she is the Edsel on the scale of beauty.  The beauty standards for a woman of today are intangibly high.  The few, the proud, the beautiful are heralded with such enthusiastic splendor that to become the higher echelon eye candy is a means with which we are taught “we can have it all.”  Riches, Love, Popularity, Opportunity.  It is a sick society we live in when a person is judged solely upon their looks–and even worse that our teens feel they must conform to a standard that can never be maintained.   Reality TV continually force-feeds us a frightening amount of disregard for human feelings with celebrities with no conscience as a conduit. 

Be strong ladies, plastic surgery is a choice, not a requirement to be beautiful. You already are beautiful. Don’t let them take that away from you with such thoughtless commentary.  They can only hurt you if you let them. 

Dr. Phil: You Disgust Me

I am going to open this blog by saying I simply do NOT care if anyone gets upset with me for stating my feelings about this poor excuse for a therapist. I am angry and I am going to express it.  I have stayed quiet for far too long and although I am sure he will never read this, I feel I must speak my mind.   

I have had experience with dealing with his people twice–both for rhinoplasty patients. One episode involved one of our revision rhinoplasty forum members where even though she couldn’t breathe and her nose was visibly in need of reconstruction, Dr. Phil proceeded to belittle her and tell her that she needed therapy, not another nose job.  Ever since this episode, I have chosen not to even utter the man’s name without being associated with expletives.   After tonight’s episode, I am even more P.O.’ed.

I was thumbing through the channels and saw the description  of two daughters who are dealing with their father’s choice in living as a woman.   Firstly, while I sympathize with the two daughters in that it must be very difficult for them to understand and accept this issue, living as a transgendered (or transsexual) individual is difficult enough, without being degraded by your family on national television.  Suicide rates have been reported between the 20% and 30% range among transgenders and transsexuals.  So, while you may be upset you lost your “dad” to Layla, honestly, imagine having to live in the body of someone you did not choose to be.  I had a very good transgendered friend who had fathered two children (who both, by the way, eventually accepted her choice).  Do you really think that transgendered, or transsexual, individuals enjoy the hormone therapy, surgical procedures to remove and alter genitals, the ridicule, being ostracized, or even the death threats?   For one second put yourself into their shoes and try to imagine that this is not a choice.  Imagine just how hard it is to stay quiet when you feel you are being treated unfairly, now imagine that the very core of your being expected to stay hidden beneath the surface of a lie; a farce that society insists that you must maintain to be accepted.

The two daughters, who were obviously angry for many reasons, some justifiable, others stemming from confusion and prompting from their mothers.  Accusations of being self centered by “choosing” to remain living as a woman are uncalled for.  It isn’t about choosing anymore, it is about being who you are.

To the defense of the two girls, and their mothers, Layla had not been paying child support for some time and chose not to be a part of the girls’ lives.  Shame on you Layla, you may not wish to be called “Dad” but you sure as heck better take on the responsibility of being a parent.  The financial excuse given by Layla was that her business had failed, yet she found the money to pay for the expensive hormone therapy, hair and nail appointment, etc.  Although hormone therapy was needed, this is no excuse.   If I am forgoing nail appts right now, you sure as hell can. Layla’s excuse given was because the children didn’t attempt to contact him/her.  They are children, and as bitter as they are about your transition, you still need to step up to the plate and be a parent.   My father chose not to be apparent in my life, and while I came out relatively okay, it still messes with you later on in life, in your choices for adult relationships, etc.  Don’t let that happen to your girls.

My real beef, however, is with Dr. Phil. You nasty, opportunistic, predatory jerk.  How dare you exploit the lives of those who are in pain in the name of ratings.  Do you really think your one hour of therapy, free airfare, and free hotel room can make an honest to goodness change in someone’s life?  Knowing a few people who have been on your show, I can say I think not.  I have been on enough talk shows and media productions to know full well, people of your ilk don’t care past the time it takes to usher your guests out the door  Oprah, God Bless her, should have kicked you to the curb once you got too big for your britches.  Your version of Tough Love doesn’t work on those who  have a high rate of suicide, so stop being such an elitist bully.  You need to rethink your ways, pal, and stop stepping on the feelings of others to climb your way to the top.  You are no better than Jerry Springer in my eyes.

Do Your Friends Make You Feel Unattractive?

I recently read an article, called The Beguiling Truth About Beauty [Carlin Flora; Psychology Today May/Jun 2006]  http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-20060424-000001.html  that had me reevaluating the effects of other people’s appearance on our own self esteem.  We all say that we may not be affected by the beauty of others, but unconsciously most of us are. 

Have you ever found yourself becoming self conscious when surrounded by a group of beautiful people?  Now, before you say anything, forget that we all know that appearance is not what truly matters. I know this, you know this.  I mean on a purely unconscious level, when you see a group of younger, attractive, physically fit people at the beach, do you secretly wish that you looked thinner, tanner, had longer hair, were younger, or this or that?  We all have insecurities somewhere deep inside.  It is a matter of what triggers them.  We just don’t realize that being around, or compared to, a very attractive person, it can obliterate our esteem to a certain degree even when normally we are very secure with ourselves.

Of course, some of these feelings diminish with age, and new ones are created because of it. When I was younger I had found myself never leaving the house without being made up, but these days it just isn’t as important to me.  But then again, I am not single. Interestingly, if I am with my boyfriend I will usually put on make-up and dress a little better.  Why is this, considering he doesn’t look at other women in a threatening manner—so that’s not the reason.  I feel it is because I don’t want other women thinking, “why is he with her??” and trying to flirt with him purposely in front of me.  That would instigate a scene, I assure you, hehe.  With my ex-fiancé, I remember always running out of the house with full face make-up because that relationship made me feel insecure, he liked the attention of others it seemed and it made me feel threatened. These are just my insecurities; they are part of who I am.   I cannot explain it, it is what it is.  

Other people, and what they have accomplished, or what they look like, can and does affect us whether we like it or not. Be it an impressionable teen, or a seasoned, and very hardened businessman, insecurity arises from a sense of personal inadequacy.  Many times it is a product of our surroundings. For instance, reading a ton of Vogue magazines in all of its airbrushed, perfectly-thin glory can make us feel unattractive.  It can also trigger us to have cosmetic surgery, start a new diet, slip dinner entirely, buy a new outfit, get a new haircut, etc. Being around corporate bigwigs all day, knowing you are struggling paycheck to paycheck can either make you bitter and resentful, or hugely envious.  It can also make you strive to be more, do more, to become more successful.  Thin k about when you have played Trivial Pursuit with a group of above average intelligent people, have you ever felt, what if I get an answer wrong?  I have.  The fact of the matter is we all have, at least once in our life, cared about what others think and have had them affect us somehow.

How many of you have looked at “Thinspiration” photos to trigger your butt into gear to start a diet and exercise regimen?  At the risk of those who feel I have an eating disorder (If I did, wouldn’t I be super thin??), still I admit I have.    However, I do not resent other women for being more attractive (or thinner) than I am.  I am quick to compliment a beautiful woman without any strings attached.  And I have been met with either rudeness (as if I am trying to pick up on her! LOL!) or by complete shock and gushing thanks.  

What I find disturbing is a trend where people choose their friends based upon attractiveness, whether it is to not have competition or surround themselves with beauty.  How weird is it that one would choose a friend on this “asset” alone? What ever happened to personality, trust, generosity, same interests?  Some people actually chose what they feel is a group of less attractive friends so they will receive the attention and adoration of others without competition. Issues. 

I would check out the article and if you could, can you tell me any stories you have where you have noticed a dip in esteem because of your surroundings?  I know I am not the only person that is at least somewhat affected by my environment.  I would love to hear from you J

Sex And The City – Plastic Surgery?

Okay, okay.  I will admit it. I have never watched an episode of Sex and the City nor did I know the difference between Samantha and Carrie until last night. Oh. My. God.  Are these ladies fabulous or what??  What an incredible group of characters; no wonder this was made into a movie!  The characters are completely and totally believable; the character empathy is above and beyond, this movie is a success in my eyes.  Not that my opinion matters, but it grasped emotions that were buried so deep down, fears I didn’t know existed, nor had I even considered.  Then it rescued me with the romantic idea of endless possibilities and the assurance that aging means nothing more than gaining wisdom and building a collection of experiences.  This all coming from someone who had only heard of Mr. Big in the fleeting conversations of passersby. 

• Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker).  How SJP can pull off beautiful, edgy, feminine, and masculine all in one movie is beyond me.  She is a wonder-talent whom you cannot help but empathize with.  Carrie is a character you can find strength in, and a natural beauty that does not conform to the cutesy-nosed, breast implanted ilk that has become the Hollywood standard. Good for her!  If she gets Botox (not that I would care, or judge her for) it is apparently done well and conservative.  Then again, actors are often told to stay off the Botox before a movie starts filming. Going over photos of her from award events, it does appear that she does get her forehead ‘toxed.  All in all, Carrie represents the energy and essence of the empowered woman in her early forties.
• Samantha Jones (Kim Cattrall). Samantha is my favorite for several reasons.  She is bold, she is beautiful, she lives her life as she sees fit and her dry, witty humor never ceased to shock me throughout the movie.  The last thing this woman looks is her age.  I only hope to look this great at 52.   Her cheeks are amazing.  At one point I thought perhaps she had had a neck lift and a minor face/brow lift, but who really knows.  If she did, it was conservative and done quite well.  No wind tunnel look in this movie, and thank goodness for it.  Perhaps she only gets Botox in her glabella and a few fillers occasionally. Although her outer brows seem a little lifted.  This could very well be from Botox as I have had this area injected a few times. 
• Charlotte York (Kristin Davis).  How can you not like Charlotte?  She is sweet, refined, and a doll to boot!   Idealists can be refreshing sometimes.  You know what they say; “Cynics are idealists which have had their blindfolds removed by the harsh reality of life’s experiences”.  On a beauty note, isn’t she just gorgeous?  She gets away with very little eye make up and still looks fabulous on TV.   I would have never known she was in her early forties.  Ever!  I thought she was in her mid to late thirties.  She doesn’t appear to have had any surgery, but my guess is she loves getting Botox to her forehead.  Her forehead is as smooth as a baby’s bottom. Good for her!
• Miranda Hobbes (Cynthia Nixon). I love redheads.  Actually, my mother is a redhead.  She is a good cynical balance to Charlotte’s idealistic character on the show.  It is difficult to actually find a candid photo of Nixon when she is truly smiling.  In the photos I have seen of her being animated, it appears she gets Botox to her forehead.  Regardless, she should smile more!
• Smith Jerrod (Jason Lewis).  Good Lord.  Seriously girls, Jason Lewis is Man-Candy in every sense of the word.  A strong, square jaw line, strong chin, high cheekbones, light eyes and a tall, tone athletic body gets me every time.  Good Lawd!! Anyway, that’s all. I had no real point in mentioning him in this article. I don’t hink he has anything done. I am throwing him in just because he is hot. Heh!

Fashion

I must admit that I have never seen anyone dress as elaborately as the ladies in SITC in New York City. Not in the Village, not in Central Park , not in Manhattan, not Park Avenue, not even on Broadway unless they were in costume.  Every time I go to NY I notice dark hair, dark lipstick and dark clothing—and lots of wheel-away luggage and tennis shoes! 

When I first went to NYC I felt I stuck out like a sore thumb.  I had long. Platinum blond hair, HUGE implants, and I was dressed in bright pink tops and huge platform shoes with lots of shiny, silver jewelry.  Frankly, I looked like a tart.  When I went back to California, I toned it down a bit.  This was not Vegas! Besides, black is slimming and as you age you will appreciate this little fact.

In closing, although the movie was very long by usual standards, it didn’t seem like it at all.  Not once did I ever think, ‘when is this ever going to end!’  It was an entertaining tryst into the lives of 4 wonderful characters who give me hope that life isn’t all downhill after 36! (WAHHH THIRTY SIX!!)  Then again, it is Hollywood and movies usually aren’t made to make us feel like spinsters with dwindling egg caches caught in a man-less downward spiral. *Did I say that outloud??* 

Age should be celebrated, it should be heralded that yes, we are living life and it is not passing us by.  THAT, my dear readers, is what we should be afraid of…not wrinkles but rather letting life pass us by. At any age, if you are out there living life to its fullest, every wrinkle and freckle is worth it. Although I do intend to fight it all the way, I will not let it get me down anymore.  Life is short and even if I die tomorrow, I don’t want to sit on the side bench wishing I could be doing this or that.  Embrace your life experiences, your years, your lessons.   Just thank goodness we have the option to kick the accompanying wrinkles to the curb as long as we can!

The Gold Facial Treatment: A Luxury Gimmick?

First off the price tag alone would keep me away from The 24K Gold Facial Treatment, or GFT for short.  Brought to you by the Chinese company, UMO, the Gold Facial Treatment is making its way to The States—and fast.  This fancy facial is about $300-$360 US and involves having your face painted in liquid 24K gold and sitting under a special misting unit.  I don’t get facials anyway because I have the old Feather Lift Threads in my face and shouldn’t have my face manipulated. So, what is the benefit of a gold facial other than bragging rights?   In my opinion, having 24K gold transferred to my face is just a waste of my hard-earned dollars.  The only thing more wasteful is using caviar for facials, hair treatments and massages.  Are they insane??  I love Beluga far too much to waste it topically. Grab me my Mother-of-Pearl spoon and maybe a little crème fraiche and I’m good!

After the 24K gold is applied to your skin, your face is then positioned under a negative Ion “Nano-mister” fortified with their proprietary polypeptide delivery agent, Gamma Poly Glutamic Acid (or Gamma-PGA).  You may have also heard it called Natto Gum, which is a Japanese product made through the fermentation of boiling soya beans and Bacillus subtilis, or Bacillus natto.  Natto Gum is found in many Asian beauty products and is heralded for its amazing moisturizing properties.  UMO claims to have created a new way to use this all-natural, soy-based, delivery system which allows essential hydration, as well as the gold’s properties to be absorbed topically.  The negative ions are said to also repair the hair, resulting in smoother, shinier hair.  UMO claims that as the gold is absorbed into the skin it causes a low level inflammatory reaction thereby causing rapid cell turnover. The supposed advantage of these treatments is an enhanced skin renewal process that is said to be accelerated, producing a younger, fresher, plumper appearance.

Would I try it if someone paid for it?  Heck yeah I would! But I am so not forking over $300. for a treatment which has no readily available histological evidence proving its efficacy.  What do you think about this treatment?  Is it a waste of money or do you feel that with the new technology, the benefits of a gold mask would be worth the cost?  After all, we pay this much for standard beauty treatments that barely work at all.  But then again, that’s a round of Botox or Restylane!  I’ll take either, inot both!.

More: http://www.umoamerica.com/gold_facial.php

So Who Do YOU Want to Look Like?

Brangelina: Hollyweird’s most influential Power Couple.  I must admit I have walked into my PS’s office and stated that I wanted Angelina’s lips and brow arch, so count me in I suppose.  How about you?  Are you coveting Angie’s lovely cheeks and lips?  Are you a man wishing to be more Pitt-ish?  Apparently, you aren’t alone.  A recent ISAPS survey determined that many of us want to look like Brangelina and are willing to have cosmetic surgery to achieve it. 

Plastic Surgery can certainly improve your appearance, but it usually cannot make you look like an entirely different person without substantial bony work.  Unless, of course, you already have a similar facial structure, eye color, height, hair color—the similarities can’t simply stop at the nose or lips.  If your goal is to be a look alike and you plan on making a career out of it, I understand,  But if you are the average, every day Joe looking to resemble Brad, you have a lot of surgery ahead of you. 

It is in my opinion, that one should aim to be comfortable looking like yourself, just improved and refreshed.  Although, who am I to say what you should strive for?  Do as you please.  If you want to have extensive surgery to look like Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie, it is your decision.  Just know that it doesn’t involve just a brow lift, a nose job and lip implants.

So, who do you want to look like?  Do you wish to resemble Adriana Lima, Jessica Biel (who wouldn’t??), Jessica Alba?  Is it possible?  How far are you willing to go?  Surgical alteration of the bony structure of your face can be extensive, painful and require considerable downtime.  After all, the structure of the face determines the appearance.   It isn’t all smoke and mirrors. Your bones make you who you are on the surface.

If I had my druthers, I am not quite sure who I’d try and resemble. Maybe a mixture of Angelina Jolie, Adriana Lima, and Natasha Henstridge?  They all have very desirable features.  They are all very beautiful women adored by many.  Not that ai want to be adored or anything.  I am just not willing to undergo the amount of surgery, if it were even possible to begin with, to resemble any of these ladies.  I simply try to improve upon what I have to achieve a general consensus of desirable beauty: fuller lips, fuller and higher cheeks, no wrinkles, even skin tone, arched brows, small nose, bright eyes, straight, white teeth, healthy long hair, thin, lithe frame.  The end result is the same goal, we all just have differences we must contend with. 

Achieving facial harmony and balance is a goal many of us have, without necessarily looking like anyone else but ourselves.  I am sure many of us don’t strive to look like a celebrity, be it Angelina or the Jessicas.  Not that we would give it away if we had it.  But I believe many of us are not attempting to surgically alter our faces to truly resemble these ladies, we just wish to have smaller noses, fuller lips, or more prominent cheeks as all the beautiful icons seem to have in common.  However, when we walk into our surgeon’s office, we choose a person who is familiar to us all to explain out desires.

How many of you have brought photos of celebrities to your consultations to give your surgeon a visual in what you are attempting to achieve?  I must admit I have brought photos of what I wanted and what I did not want.  A tool with which to determine if he and I were on the same page, not a grocery list of procedures to alter our ensure beings for the sake of being a look-alike. 

I would love to hear from you all. Who do you find attractive?  Which of their features appeal to you and have you brought in photos of said person to get your point across?  It doesn’t mean you’re necessarily obsessed and dissatisfied with who you are, it means you know what you like and what you don’t like.  Who do you find beautiful and what makes them beautiful?

Jennifer Love Hewitt: Fat Or Not?

An Open Letter To Bullies and “Weight-Nazis”

Now that I have your attention, the word “fat” is extremely derogatory. I hate that word.  Those of you know me, know I have “weight issues” and I am sensitive to the word.  So much talk about Jennifer, Tyra, even of Kate Moss gaining weight.  I am so sick and tired of the media plastering less-than-flattering photos next to the words, “THUNDER THIGHS EXPOSED”, “Baby Bump?”, and the like.  May these journalists trip on their Manolos and fall face-first on a chocolate cake and inhale it.

Has JLH gained weight?  Yes, but don’t we all at one point.  It doesn’t take a nuclear physicist to look at a “thin” photo of JLH and compare it to the ones we have seen lately and conclude that yes, she has gotten heavier.  Magazines like InTouch, Star and Us are continually guilty of not only demonizing weight gain (unless you’re anorexic), but of glorifying perfection in general.

JLH responded to the awful articles by claiming she is a size 2 and that a “size 2 is not fat”.  Well, at first I thought to myself, there is NO way she is a 2 in those photos.  Well in all honestly, I have no clue if she is a 2, and you’re right Jennifer, a size 2 is definitely not “fat”. 

So, I looked up her height and she claims to be 5’ 2 ½”;  I am 3 1/2 inches taller than she is and even at my sickliest, most depressed weight of 111 lb I can only get to a 4.  She has a small waist and a large bottom, as do I. But I have a couple of inches on her.  She could very well be a 2, who knows. And more importantly, WHO CARES!?!?

I wonder how we’d feel if we were hounded by the paparazzi 24-7?  Every time we didn’t have make-up on, didn’t have a ‘thin-day’, pulled our panties out of our cracks or got out of a vehicle without any for that matter, the very next day it would be front page news.  Not cool.

The moral of the story is, be kind to people.  When you find yourself making fun of someone, put yourself in their shoes. Stop being so judgmental in your miserable lives.    You aren’t perfect either, so stop acting like it.